1 Know your self.

Having a clearly defined sense of who you really are is essential. So many people end up doing jobs and even running businesses that they hate because they lose sight of this. Know what you value the most in life and integrate what you are doing with who you really are.     

2 Be yourself.

Knowing who you really are and being it are two different things. You may have realised some time ago that you love the great outdoors and you're stuck in an office 60 hours a week. What is going on? Life is very short so do whatever you have to do in order to be yourself. 

3 Discover your true values.

You may have a vague idea of what you value in life - your home, hour family and/or your holidays. It is worth taking some time to get really specific about what you value. For example, if you said holidays, what do you value about your holidays? Is it a love of the countryside? A love of travel? A love of languages? A sense of adventure? A spiritual pilgrimage? Identify what you can't live without in your life.

4 Integrate your values into your work.

Once you know what your true values are, do some research into which careers or businesses would incorporate those very values. If a particular job, or business, appeals to you speak to people in the industry. Speak to at least 6 and ask each of them what they love about their role and what they hate about their role.

5 Know your strengths.

If you are employed how often do you get to do what you do best, every single day? Do you know what it is that you can do better than thousands of other people? What are your natural gifts and talents? Find out and exploit it. Build skills and knowledge on top of what is already a natural flair and you will have a great strength. If you fancy being self-employed, what is it about self-employment that appeals? People who are great at managing organisations, and people with entrepreneurial flair, possess two completely different skill sets. People who are great at managing people, and people who love statistics, possess completely different skill sets. Find out what it is that you are fantastic at, and use it.

6 Get 'in the flow' and stay there.

You may have heard of athletes and sports people talking about being 'in the zone'. They are talking about a state of mind where they are performing at their peak, yet it almost feels easy, they feel like they are almost on auto-pilot. And to outsiders, they make whatever they are doing appear easy. This is called being 'in the flow' When you are in flow you are challenged slightly. You are working at your peak. If you are challenged too much you feel overwhelmed and your performance drops, if you are not challenged enough you get bored and again, your performance drops. Finding the right level to stay 'in the flow' keeps you interested, happy and at the peak of your own performance. You are at the cutting edge of your own potential - pushing back your own frontiers.

7 Only do what you love.

You can short-cut a lot of this by simply doing what you love. When you resent, loathe or detest doing something it is a sure sign that it's wrong for you! When you really love doing something so that if you won the lottery you would probably continue doing it, you have found your niche in life.

8 Have courage.

Whenever we make any change, even that which is desired like a switch to a better job, or becoming self-employed, anxiety is normal. We experience anxiety whenever we leave the familiar and move out of our comfort zone. This causes us to have second thoughts and get 'cold feet' about our intended change. When you learn to transcend your fear you can achieve anything.

9 Get help when you need it.

No-one does anything alone. Jesus could work miracles and even he had 12 disciples. Get help to overcome your fear, discover your values and your strengths and make the changes you need to. Hire a coach or career counsellor to help with this, and use your support network.

10 Honour your SELF.

Notice how you feel in every situation and honour that. There really is no need to tolerate anything that makes you unhappy or uncomfortable. One of the worst pieces of advice I was ever given was: 'we all have to do things we don't like'. It isn't true. We don't. Know what it is you love and do nothing else.

©Ruth Hadikin 2002. This article may not be reproduced whole or in part without permission from the author. To obtain permission e-mail Ruth Hadikin at ruth@dreamcoach.co.uk   
         

Further reading:

NOW Discover Your Strengths by Marcus Buckingham and Donald Clifton

 Marcus Buckingham and Donald O Clifton's Now, Discover Your Strengths proposes a unique approach to managing personnel: focus on enhancing people's strengths rather than eliminating their weaknesses. Effectively managing personnel--as well as one's own behaviour--is an extraordinarily complex task that, not surprisingly, has been the subject of countless books touting what each claims is the true path to success. Following up on the coauthors' popular previous book, First, Break All the Rules, it fully describes 34 positive personality themes the two have formulated (such as Achiever, Developer, Learner, and Maximiser) and explains how to build a "strengths-based organisation" by capitalising on the fact that such traits are already present among those within it.

Take Yourself to The Top by Laura Berman Fortgang

Life coaches focus on the future not the past, they look at obstacles to success and fulfilment not to open them up for introspection but to overcome them and achieve goals. In this guide the author acts as the reader's own personal life coach. She shares her secrets for getting out of a rut, learning how to go beyond "just getting by" and taking charge. This book is for those ready to make the leap to the next level of success. Inspiring case studies of Berman's clients back up her tips.

Loving What Is by Byron Katie with Stephen Mitchell

I highly recommend this book for everyone who wants an end to their suffering and is willing to be gentle and honest with themselves in the process.

NLP at work by Sue Knight.

Sue Knight explains the difference that makes the difference between those who excel and those who 'get by' in the way they communicate, motivate, influence, negotiate, lead, empower and manage their own self-development. As she says: "Change your mind and keep the change"